Lately, I've had more emotional ups and downs that made me think about how I come across to other people.
Don't you sometimes wish if you could have your life videotaped so that you can just whip out the tape to see what really happened? Then again, maybe none of us would do any of those stupid things if we knew we could be re-examined any moment...
I think self-evaluation is a very good thing and can even be a positive thing. It does give you an opportunity to better yourself and also refocus on values that you do belive in. At the end of the day, I am who I am. I've already become who I will be for the most part. It's just the fine-tuning that is left to me, and I am responsible for how often and throughly I take on this more-often-than-not unpleasant task.
Thinking about how most of who I am is already set reminds me of the importance of constantly teaching our children the value we hope to instill in them. Here are some traits that are high on my mind.
1. I hope they understand how lucky they are and be generous with others.
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Our neighborhood children collectively donated books to an orphanage in the Philippines with the help from Master Beater. Here, he's photographed with the children during his presentation. He did a great job of raising awareness in our privileged youngsters that "stuff" is not the only thing that those children lack. They don't even have their own families that love them above all others. Nothing else even matters at that point.
2. I hope they appreciate who they are.
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That includes knowing your heritage and values. I think it's especially important for the multi-cultural families to endorse all aspects of their heritage. If they cannot love and enjoy all the qualities that they are a part of, how can they love themselves? That's why it's so important for me not to force them my own values--all I can do is to expose them and let them mold their own identities.
3. I hope they grow up to be honest people.
In Kite Runner, the father character tells his son that all the sins in the world are derivatives of stealing. I believe this to be quite accurate, obviously with some exceptions. This is why I make a point of returning any coin/thing/whatever found in random places no matter how insignificant the value is--if it doesn't belong to you, it's stealing if you keep it.
4. I hope they have happy marriages.
I probably won't have much control over this other than hopefully leading by an example--and hoping and praying--but how important is this? Your spouse can make your life rich and prosperous or just plain miserable. I hope that our own success and mistakes will teach them never to settle for someone.
What are the things that are important in your family?
I'd LOVE to hear it if you are willing to share your formula with the rest of the world!
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